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View Full Version : Week of October 6th, 2009

Debbie D
10-04-2009, 11:31 PM
Sorry folks! We're having computer problems this week. It will be a few days before I can judge last weeks, but in the mean time, here is the new one for this week.
6855
tel
10-05-2009, 04:31 AM
How celebrates 100 hours of clean living!
Robert Linford
10-05-2009, 06:03 AM
Debbie, has this pic been artificially coloured? They never had colour film when How was only 100.

This pensioner has a last cigarette before the introduction of the new Tory scheme to get her back to work.
Robert Linford
10-05-2009, 06:06 AM
Do-gooding busybodies immediately inform this pensioner that if she keeps smoking, she's only got a few years to live.
How Brown
10-05-2009, 07:11 AM
Oh, I remember her....Robert asked her out last week and his neighbors now all call him a cradle robber....:drum:
Jon Simons
10-05-2009, 07:37 AM
Outrage as callous Nursing Home staff issue elderly, incontinent residents with Birthday cakes decorated with the word LOO
Caroline Morris
10-05-2009, 07:54 AM
"It's not smoking that ages me - it's keeping my 100th lover a secret from the other 99".
Caroline Morris
10-05-2009, 08:00 AM
Tumblety looked on wistfully - how he would have liked to celebrate having his 100th fag.
Archaic
10-05-2009, 09:32 AM
Social do-gooders have successfuly raised the Minimum Legal Age to purchase tobacco-related products
to an all-time high; critics complain that they have gone too far.
Archaic
10-05-2009, 09:36 AM
Mabel is so sick of Nursing Homes and the Establishment that at age 100

she finally decides to tune in, turn on, and drop out.

:hippie:
Archaic
10-05-2009, 09:43 AM
When asked what she wanted for her Centary Birthday,

Great-Great-Grandma shocked several generations of her family by answering "A bloody great spiff!!!"
Caroline Morris
10-05-2009, 09:51 AM
When asked the secret of a long and happy life, old Mary replied:

"Oh that's easy. I let a friend have my bed back in November 1888".
Robert Linford
10-05-2009, 10:07 AM
This old lady, a smoker aged 100, is apt to get a bit short of breath. So it was very cruel of Howard to give her a cake with re-igniting candles.
Archaic
10-05-2009, 12:36 PM
FAG HAG




(Man, I feel guilty for this one!) My conscience is gnawing away at my funny-bone...
Sam Flynn
10-05-2009, 03:22 PM
I never realised Barry Cryer was that old!



...one for the Brits - not a caption entry.
Sam Flynn
10-05-2009, 03:41 PM
JTR-related: Bagster Phyllis

Non-related: Puffing Biddy
Robert Linford
10-05-2009, 04:40 PM
"I never realised Barry Cryer was that old!"

Smokers Wild.
Sam Flynn
10-05-2009, 05:05 PM
"I never realised Barry Cryer was that old!"

Smokers Wild.
I'm Sorry, I Haven't A Fume
Sam Flynn
10-05-2009, 05:11 PM
I was debating whether to use this, but here goes...

Most foul: "I used to be able to smoke with me minge when I were a young lass, y'know. Nowadays, it'd just fall out on to 't floor..."
Caroline Morris
10-05-2009, 06:45 PM
And there was I, worrying about doing a 'grab a granny for a blow job' gag...
Robert Linford
10-05-2009, 08:20 PM
Let nobody mention "faire une pipe".
Archaic
10-06-2009, 02:04 PM
Marlborough Ma'am.
Gumshoe
10-06-2009, 02:13 PM
Dateline 2054:

Mishter Brown had been warned about the possible side effects of smoking genetically-modified tobacco, but decided that the reward would be worth the risk if he could outlive all of his enemies.
Archaic
10-06-2009, 02:44 PM
Hey, Gumshoe... do you mean that

How would rather switch than fight???
Robert Linford
10-06-2009, 02:59 PM
How outlive ALL his enemies? That's like trying to stop the tide coming in by bailing out the beach.:happy:
Archaic
10-06-2009, 03:08 PM
Robert, Robert....

Think Sharks and Cockroaches...it's simple De-Evolution.
Archaic
10-06-2009, 06:48 PM
Openly acknowledging the fact that the only people who still smoke are the ones who don't care if it kills them, Virginia Slims introduces the first Cigarette Ad specifically aimed at the Extremely Elderly:

"Happy 100th Birthday- You've Come A Long Way, Baby!"
Debbie D
10-10-2009, 10:37 PM
Sorry folks.... early judging this week.
I'm off on short term disability for a bad shoulder injury and I don't know if I'll be in horrid pain tomorrow evening or not. Since no one wants my caption judging abilities ipaired by pain killers again, my loss is your gain! Here are the early results and I will also post the new image early also!


Ripper
:first: Caroline Morris "Tumblety looked on wistfully - how he would have liked to celebrate having his 100th fag."
:second: Caroline Morris "When asked the secret of a long and happy life, old Mary replied:"Oh that's easy. I let a friend have my bed back in November 1888"."


Non Ripper
:first: Jon Simons "Outrage as callous Nursing Home staff issue elderly, incontinent residents with Birthday cakes decorated with the word LOO"


Brown Related
:first: Tel "How celebrates 100 hours of clean living!"
:second: Robert Linford "Debbie, has this pic been artificially coloured? They never had colour film when How was only 100."


Caption Most Foul
:puke: Sam Flynn ""I used to be able to smoke with me minge when I were a young lass, y'know. Nowadays, it'd just fall out on to 't floor..."


Caption Most Annoying
:deadhorse: How Brown "Oh, I remember her....Robert asked her out last week and his neighbors now all call him a cradle robber...."
How Brown
10-11-2009, 12:09 PM
Gee...I was most annoying. Who would have ever dreamed that ?

I'll tell ya whats annoying...wasting valuable ineteliigense and the pain in me crotch week after week of being kicked there in these rigged events.

May the worms of all Indianapolis's dogs and animals even higher up on the Darwinian scale...such as African honey badgers and two toed sloths...make a beeline for your buttocks while at work or giving a lecture on animal care in front of a lotta people one day soon.