Week of Christmas, 2009

[Debbie D]

In the humble observance of Howard's birthday this past week and the upcoming holiday this week, I give you your weekly caption photo! You know what to do.... now I'm off to judge the last two weeks.:kiss:

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[How Brown]

"He better not huff
He better not puff
He'll need the air
One lung ain't enough....:violin:
Tim Mosley is close to coming...to town...."


He's making his list
Of things to do with the doll
Got his own special mama
A Pearly Poll...:violin:
Tim Mosley is close to coming...to town



He inflates her when she's sleepin'
He deflates her when shes' awake
He knows its wrong, but he's been doin' it so long
It don't matter, for goodness sakes...:violin:

"He better not huff
He better not puff
He'll need the air
One lung ain't enough....
Tim Mosley is close to coming...to town....":violin:

[How Brown]

Have a holly jolly blow up doll
Its the best thing that goes with beer...
I don't know if I got the air to blow
But wish me well my dear
Have a holly jolly blow up
and when you walk down to the adult book shop
Say hello to Raincoat Joe
and every undercover cop....

[How Brown]

Those are but a few examples of my upcoming " Gather Round For Christmas In Mitre Square" album that I'm considering hiring Sam Flynn to do some singin' on...and Jon Rees on tambourine.

You'll enjoy such standards as...

Silent Night, Holy shit mister is that a knife Night ?
The 12 letters of Issenschmidt
Come All Ye Unfortunates
The Little Dauber Boy
Hark ! The Miriam Angels Sing !
The Knife Before Christmas
and much more....

Only on Baphomet Records
(an EMI subsidiary)

[Caroline Morris]

Festive Paradox: "If I give her a little prick, will she go down on me for Christmas?"

[Caroline Morris]

"I want my money back. This one's got frostbite - her nips have gone black already."

[Jon Simons]

Thomas Bowyer: Receiving no reply, I passed round the corner by the gutter spout where there is a broken window There was a curtain. I put my hand through the broken pane and lifted the curtain.

[Caroline Morris]

Jiggle balls
Jiggle balls
Jiggle all the way
Oh what fun How’ll have to ride
His Christmas doll today
Jiggling here, jiggling there
What a lovely feeling,
When Nina sees those jiggling balls
They’ll be dangling from the ceiling.

[Caroline Morris]

Grandfather had to count his blessings - not quite so many signs of recent connection this year.

[Robert Linford]

This is the only blow job that Howard will be allowed this Christmas.

[Jon Simons]

Attenborough was not available for comment following the recent DVD release of the making of "Miracle on 34th Street"

[Currerbell]

The Ripper used Voodoo Dolls to decide on his next victim...

[Currerbell]

Due to the children being very naughty this year, Father Xmas took a break from work on December 24th and decided to have some fun...:thumb:

[Sam Flynn]

JTR-related: How Jack really removed the kidney - revealed at last.

Non-related: Harold "Hairy" Palmer, the Dirty Old Man of jazz, has crossed a sex-toy with a trumpet to get a strumpet.

Most foul: Children flee in terror as department store's cannibal Santa vomits his lunch all over them.

Liturgical antiphon-related: Valve et vagina.

[Currerbell]

Nina wondered where How had got to when it came to a fourth serving of Christmas pudding, she found him behind the tree...

[Robert Linford]

Nina was right : How should never have sung that Roxy Music song at the Christmas karaoke :

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LSniBxXjK_8

[How Brown]

note to self..send a blow up doll with crazy glue smeared all over the blowhole to bigmouth Linford...and then lets see Robert go caroling with the neighbors this year...that I'd pay to see..


Very funny Robert...about that being the only hummer on the horizon.

You just broke Sir Bob's heart.:brick:

[Stephen Thomas]

The last lady Howard had that looked like this just farted and flew out of the window.

[Caroline Morris]

In Dublin's fair city, where the plain wrapper babies are so pretty...

Old Mick: "Roight me little sauce pot. Just let me take me teeth out and you are in for the best Christmas in your loife."

[Chris G.]

Once again, Howard found himself Scrooged for Christmas. His birthday movie was a cross between "Blow Up" and "Suck Up."