Week of May 17, 2010

[String]

Ok another week another caption contest, your best entires in the Ripper, non-ripper and Howard Brown categories. First prize this week is a week an all expenses paid (50c max a day) vacation (sleeping on Howards couch), second prize is two weeks. So continuing on with our animal theme in another thread:

[How Brown]

That looks just like one of the rooms in my house, String...exceptin' there isn't a girl in it.

Good choice for the caption this week. Ewe did great.

[WRITEFX]

Mutton dressed as lamb, was the number one reason that elderly entrants were dropped from this year's JTR forum pageant, the other reasons were bad captions and bribing judges.

[Rbaynton]

Acting on the lead that the Ripper was a welshman, Sir Charles Warren abandoned using bloodhounds (sorry this may be a bit obscure for non-Bristolians - Ali will understand!)

[Nemo]

I can't make my mind up - could I see the sheep in the underwear please?


I tried this girl once but she fleeced me...


When I said show me to the bar...


What a time to forget my wellies...


Forget Dolly, clone her...

[Adam Went]

Having seen this photo as a preview to "Silence Of The Lambs", the movie was definitely not what I was expecting.....

Cheers,
Adam. :evil:

[Debbie D]

Bo Peep finally found her sheep.

[Debbie D]

Celebrity Scandal: "Lambchop" is caught with a prostitute during an undercover sting.

[Caroline Morris]

Being a man, the choice was easy. Howard went for the one with no clothes on.

[Caroline Morris]

"Now what's wrong, Howard?" asked a fed up Nina. "You said 'I'd prefer ewe on all fours' - so I went specially to fetch Flossy."

[Caroline Morris]

"Yes I know I forgot the beer - get over it."

[Caroline Morris]

Howard thought he was so clever when he asked for a menagerie à trois.

[tel]

Titan Uranus Shawn!

[String]

Mans voice from outside room
"I'm home dear, I got the early train"
"What the &@8££ going on here!"
"Who the hell's this woman Mabel?"

[String]

"Can I get out of the costume Nina the heat in here's killing me"

[WRITEFX]

A Whitechapel police constable was very surprised to receive this photographic momento of his birthday taken at the Ten Bells pub, and blamed the absinthe for his woolly head in the morning.

[Cris Malone]

That looks just like one of the rooms in my house, String...exceptin' there isn't a girl in it.


Now How, let me give you some country boy's advice... now that we know you're not sheepish about this sort of thing anymore. Put her ( I hope its a her) back legs into a pair of boots turned backwards... Then step on the toe of the boots... she'll behave quite nicely then. If you don't have a good pair of boots, you can stick her head in a corner. She'll be trying to back out of there the whole time.

I must say its better than trying a cow. A 'friend' of mine tried it with ol' Bossy once in the barn and just when it got good the cow crapped in his pants.

What did Krafft-Ebing have to say about this?

P.S.- Oh, if the girl does show up you can have her cook something for you while you're busy.

[Cris Malone]

Ripper related-
" Ladies and gentlemen... The room where Sir Robert Anderson wrote 'The Lighter Years of My Official Life' has been restored to represent every detail. That is the very desk where he pondered over his manuscript."

[How Brown]

Ha ha !!! YOU...give ME.....advice on farm funnin' ?
I lived in Texas, Cris...."long enough" to know the ways of the open range, the passion of the Panhandle...

Bottom line...I put the old "Lub" into Lubbock.:thumb: ...on many a cattle drive.

[Cris Malone]

Yea, but its better on a closed range 'cause at least you ain't so tired when you catch 'um.

[How Brown]

This is very true CM...thats why I used to carry a lasso with me at all times.
That runnin' shit be for the birds.

[Cris Malone]

Of course, I you 'really' did your part, they'll start follerin' you around anyway.

[String]

Ah that's what they were talking about in the old westerns when they called someone a cowpoke.

[admin tim]

Howard: "So let me get this straight: Thelma on the right is $100 for 15 minutes, and Leweise on the left is $5 for all night........here's $5."

[How Brown]

Being a man, the choice was easy. Howard went for the one with no clothes on. --former friend Caz....

Oh, that hurt. That was a shot in chops....:caked:

[String]

"Howard, Howard, HOWARD!"
"Stop daydreaming and finish that biography on Sarah Palin"

[How Brown]

Nice one String...you made my old lady laugh...the caption mentioning the costume...

...I'll have to remember that one when I fill in the amount payable space on this "donation" check to you.

[String]

Thanks for all the captions folks. BTW anyone know if M&S does this underwear?

RIPPER RELATED
:first: Rbayton "Acting on the lead that the Ripper was a welshman..."
:second: Cris "Ladies and gentlemen... The room where Sir Robert Anderson.."
:third: WriteFx A Whitechapel police constable was very surprised to receive.."

NON-RIPPER
:first: Nemo "I can't make my mind up - could I see the sheep in the..."
:second: Adam "Having seen this photo as a preview to "Silence Of The..."
:third: Caroline "Yes I know I forgot the beer - get over it."

HOWARD BROWN RELATED
:first: Admin "Howard: "So let me get this straight: Thelma on the right..."
:second: Caroline "Now what's wrong, Howard?" asked a fed up Nina...."

[How Brown]

Oh for Chrissakes....RBaynton sends in bribes too ? I know Nemo does for damn sure.

Nice one String. You put my faith in the Irish at an all time low with this one. I was shut out completely.
Lets see if you can shut me out this coming week.

[WRITEFX]

A Whitechapel police constable was very surprised to receive this photographic momento of his birthday taken at the Ten Bells pub, and blamed the absinthe for his woolly head in the morning.

I was very surprised to see myself on the winning list this time and laughed when I read my caption because it was so apt considering I had no recollection of writing it (and no absinthe either to blame it on) LOL

[Nemo]

Yeehah!

Thanks String! :thumb:

What was the original context of the pic?

[String]

I found it on a site of strange pictures, can't remember now exactly where.

[Nemo]

Thanks String

Somehow it looks strangely familiar...

[String]

They are sometimes known as WTF pictures quite what the Whitechapel temperance fellowship has to do with it I don't know.

Another good source for strange pictures is of course Howard Browns photo album.

[tel]

I thought How's photo album was banned under the Geneva Convention?

[How Brown]

Tel:

Shut your old crusty dinosaur ass up and send me the damned moth !

String;

Be careful how you open your mail from now on. Be sure you open any letters in private and away from people who blow up easy.

Good going WFX...seeing you win gives me the same feeling I get when I hear a dentist's drill.

[WRITEFX]

Tel:

Shut your old crusty dinosaur ass up and send me the damned moth !

String;

Be careful how you open your mail from now on. Be sure you open any letters in private and away from people who blow up easy.

Good going WFX...seeing you win gives me the same feeling I get when I hear a dentist's drill.


I'll get you back..............someday when you're least expecting it.......

[tel]

Didn't the moth get there yet? I gave 'im very specific directions - circle over Philly and listen for the sound of judge bribing - 'e should 'ave reached you days ago.

[Caroline Morris]

He had to do a detour, Tel. Mick Jagger was out with his net. But don't worry. He'll never catch him. A rolling stone gathers no moth.

[tel]

Hmmm... that reminds me of the day Patrica Whack started working at the bank.

First thing this frog walks up to the counter and asks for a $12000 loan.
'Can you identify yourself?' asks Miss Whack.
'Yes,' says the frog, 'I'm the son of Mick Jagger'
'Well, you can't just walk in here and get a loan just like that, do you have any collateral?'
'Yes' say the frog, and he places a tiny pink china elephant on the counter.
'I'm sorry sir, but I can't give you a loan just on the strength of this, I'll have to consult the manager'

So off she goes to the managers office and says 'There's a frog claiming to be Mick Jagger's son at the front counter demanding a loan and when I asked for collateral he produces this - now I ask you, just what the hell is this?'

The bank manager looks at her and says .....

'It's a nick-nack, Patty Whack,
Give the frog a loan,
His old man's a Rolling Stone.'

[WRITEFX]

How's obvious misuse of the dentist drill comment to me could only be used for the last two Rolling Stone jokes from Caz and Tel. O M G is all I can think of.